Mothers Oasis

Back in the day when I was running mother and baby groups and classes, I learned how important those gatherings were with new mothers for creating a sense of community. A common occurrence for new mothers after a baby is born is a sense of isolation. The mother’s network of friends from her work life no longer seem resonant with her postpartum experience. She is confronting a turbulent set of changes that will impact her sense of self, her relationships, her expanding roles, and her future as a parent. The transition to parenthood is a powerful reset of priorities and concerns as partners become parents.

After running postpartum support groups for a few years, I zeroed in on what most new mothers were concerned about – getting back into shape and playing with their babies in meaningful ways. Reshape & Unwind (R&U) was born in 1981, and I continued to teach this class once I moved to the UK until 2001. Over the years I have received many appreciative letters from my clients who attended these classes.

• “This is the only fitness program I have ever stuck with…Or, I should say no class has had the appeal as this class has. It has given me a chance to meet other mothers and exchange information both in class and outside.” – K. Basso
• “I felt that the social interaction among all the mothers and babies in class has been the most important aspect of your class. You were responsible for initiating and stimulating conversation, questions, ideas, and general good feelings about motherhood…Thank you for sharing your expertise, sensitivity and moral support.” – L. Unger
• “Your classes gave me a weekly focus without which I might not have left the house, except to go to the market, in those early days.” – S. Still
• “To tell the truth, my first purpose was to have time to spend outside the house because a day was so long to spend just with a baby…I could spend a [w]hole two hours happily with a baby, do a little exercise and slim down, and get many friends.” – Y. Tsuchiya
• “You created a special atmosphere of warmth and trust in the class. I felt comfortable to breastfeed my baby in class and interact with her during the exercise workout. I looked forward to…class as a time to share stories, talk about concerns, laugh – and exercise.” – A. Kleinberg
• “In a setting free of ‘shoulds’, I was able to find my own way of mothering…The baby exercises were a blessing to learn because they were so much fun for both of us! “– T. Bloom
• “As I’m sure you hear from all the mums, it’s very daunting to go from being out at work all day, to being at home caring for a little baby….[the class] gave my new life as a ’mum’ a routine and the opportunity to meet other mums and see their babies develop throughout the courses.” – A. Jones

For more than twenty years I was delighted to offer a warm, nurturing space for new mothers in which connecting with others developed a sense of community. I sincerely believe that mothers long for this as they make the adjustment to parenthood. This is why I added a section to the Digital Doula^® 2.0 postnatal app called “It Takes a Village”, which emphasizes the need for community. But reading about it is not the same as having the lived experience, and as I was looking to capture the essence of new mother everyday experience I was reminded of a letter from Elyse, who expressed it perfectly for me. She was describing a get-together of friends that she had met at R&U, in which one of the babies was celebrating her first birthday and she wrote: “I looked around at all of my new friends that day and I felt so happy that we were all together for that moment.”

“I signed up for your class feeling isolated and nervous as a new mother and at my wit’s end…and I went back to work six months later, having spent five of those months in your house twice a week, a much more confident and toned up new mother!

“Through your warmth, openness, intelligence and experience with families you have created an incredibly nurturing environment in the guise of an ‘exercise class’ that I wish I could keep coming until all my children are grown!”

And this was the inspiration for the name Mothers Oasis: “Your class was like a sanctuary…a mirage of a waterfall in the desert of new mothers.”  I feel like this notion of the desert of new motherhood is still true for mothers nearly 30 years since this letter was written. That’s why we are creating this virtual community place for new mothers that carries on that supportive and nurturing experience that mothers had in my classes. We will meet on Zoom, and mothers can come as they are, be on camera or off, and connect. As Elyse said, “I made new friends who were in the same stage of life and going through similar things, so that each class was a time to trade experiences and information, a time to get support and solutions to all sorts of problems, to laugh and blow off steam…”

This is my intention for facilitating Mothers Oasis. Our next session will be on April 29, 2026, at 2:00pm EDT/ 11am PDT. 

Here’s the link:

 https://us06web.zoom.us/j/85469238422?pwd=cDNhV3AxSFJCS3JvM3lDNmtvQTNEUT09

If you are a new mother, please join us. And if you are a professional who works with new mothers, please feel free to refer them to this communal gathering of nurturing and support.